Last week, I had a high school senior in my office for a college advising appointment. A few minutes into the meeting, she blurted out, “I am so stressed! I don’t know what my passion is!!!”
Please note: I had not asked her to identify her passion, her sense of purpose, or anything related.
I responded gently, “That’s totally fine. Can you tell me an activity you enjoy and is meaningful to you?”
Without missing a beat, she replied: “Ceramic arts.”
We can start with that, I thought to myself. I asked if some of her nervousness came from worries she wouldn’t be able to make a living with ceramic arts. She nodded.
We are well-intentioned when we encourage students to identify a passion – and, more recently, find their purpose, and immediately connect it to a long-term career option. Students have misinterpreted the messages to mean they are behind or delinquent if they can’t identify a passion or sense of purpose and link it to long-term financial stability. For students like the one in my office, it creates an additional layer of stress.
How can we get students out of this stress spiral?
First, I find it helpful to step back and encourage students to identify daily habits and choices that are enjoyable and energizing. Then, see how they can connect those habits to choices on where and how they spend their time and energy each day.
And, as it relates to purpose, I’ve found many students benefit from identifying activities where they can be of service to their school, local, or greater community in ways that also feel meaningful and enjoyable to them. If this is an area of interest, help students brainstorm a list of local organizations they can connect with!
If students still feel stuck when considering what they like, or what their future aspirations are, prompt them to reflect through a structured questionnaire. This is not a crystal ball to predict the future, but rather a supplemental tool to prompt students to think more deeply about scenarios they find joy in, and tasks they don’t find much pleasure in. Sometimes taking the abstract ideas of “passion” and “purpose” and distilling them into tangible, everyday tasks, students begin to gain clarity.
Most importantly, reassure students that success is not singular; their blueprint for success should be individualized and is likely to change over time.
Warm wishes,
Ana
Links of interest:
Green Ivy Educational Consulting
Self-Calming in the Midst of Emotional Turmoil (Edutopia)
Most parents concerned their child isn’t reaching their full potential, new research finds (New York Post)
Using Social and Emotional Learning to Guide Students From Passion to Purpose (New York Times)
Meet Sassy, the AI Chatbot Helping Students Find Their Dream Jobs (EdWeek)
Most parents are concerned about the environment for their kids — here’s what they’re doing about it (New York Post)
Amazing skill!